Lalit Modi Should Start ‘International Yoga League’

Minal_Lalit_NaomiLalit Modi is a megalomanic. He also suffer from bouts of paranoia and we all know why. Now he blames Rupert Murdoch for the expose in Sunday Times as Murdoch wants to exit from Champions League. He thinks he is too important and all the big-wigs and even the UK Government has an agenda against him. But in reality he is just a tobacco seller. In the interview with Rajdeep Sardesai, Lalit Modi was bragging that he could easily get passport from any country. In fact he was haggling to buy one from Seychelles through a NRI racketeer – Sivasankaran.

Lalit Modi_Paris Hilton_CubaLalit_Kate Moss_Stephen FryFriendship with Lalit Modi is risky business and Rajasthan CM, Vasundhra Raje realized it today. Raje kept denying about giving any statement for Lalit Modi’s residency in UK but in the TV interview with Rajdeep Sardesai he spilled out that Vasundhra gave a written statement and much more. It was stupid enough on his part that MEA, Sushma Swaraj’s husband, Swaraj Kaushal and their daughter – Bansuri does not charge him legal fee. Kaushal has been his legal advisor for 22-years for gratis??? Come on!

Lalit_SRKArrogance has been the main reason for Lalit Modi’s downfall. He picked-up on Sashi Tharoor not for Kochi franchise but for ‘Miss Bollywood’ selected in South Africa when IPL was held there. South African ‘Miss Bollywood‘ got intimate with then IMG honcho, Ravi Krishnan, which Modi couldn’t digest. Tharoor was the junior MEA those days and Lalit Modi wanted Tharoor to stop “Miss Bollywood’s” visa to India. Tharoor did not indulge and Modi made him his enemy. 

Since Lalit Modi enjoys the blessings of BJP top-leaders, he should do something on Yoga – PM Modi’s pet project. He can use his network and get the global celebs like Naomi Campbell, Kate Moss, Paris Hilton and other randoms he partied with at Cuba to make International Yoga Day glamorous. SRK and other Bollywood types will follow and Keith Vaz can put in his hard ‘Labour’ and add to the chutzpah!

Shilpa Shetty & Baba Ramdev Bonding Over YOGA

shilpa shetty B'day_Ramdev copykamloops-hot-yogaThe International Yoga Day on the 21st of June is keeping the TV anchors busy and the debates cacophonic. Prime Minister Narendra Modi proposed and The United Nations accepted Modi’s proposal for an International Yoga Day and BJP is all gung-ho about it. Government has appointed Brand Ambassadors for the first International Yoga Day and has roped in Bollywood stars like Shilpa Shetty, Akshay Kumar, Virat Kohli and New-Age Gurus like Shri Shri Ravishankar and of course Baba Ramdev. Thank god Yoga guru Bikram Choudhury of ‘Hot Yoga’ fame is not a part of it. Bikram Yoga is all about titillation, sex and orgy. He is now facing sexual assault charges from many of his earlier disciples.

3ld6Ramdev_DanceComing back to Baba Ramdev and Shilpa Shetty’s bond, Shilpa was there with Ramdev on her 40th birthday just a few days back and Baba was all smiles. Ramdev has a major weakness for Bollywood. He loves to be seen with them and photographed with them. In fact his friendship with Shilpa Shetty has inspired Baba Ramdev take to dancing now.

Cameltoe

Cameltoe

By the way – 21st June in Delhi is going to hot and muggy day. All those ladies who are joining in the mega yoga run on the Rajpath, beware of the ‘Cameltoe’ problem. Look for a story soon on ‘How to avoid Cameltoe problem’ here soon!

Summer Escapade To London Is About ‘BLOW’

rawlondonbarcrawl1-620x3491186499294_fCome summer and Delhi’s rich folks head for London to escape the sweltering heat of Delhi. But over the years London has been the choicest destination for summer escape because it’s  the best city to ‘BLOW’. The money-bags BLOW insane amounts of money on their wives who shop at Bond Street as shopping keep the nagging habit of the wifey subdued. They BLOW mega bucks on nightclubs buying champagne to lure in blonde Euro-trash and score a ‘BLOW-Job’ and last but not the least, they snort the best BLOW London has to offer.

I am sure Hyde Park these days look like Lodhi Garden and Facebook is swarmed by dudes and dudettes bond-street1flaunting their pictures holidaying in London. The Aayas – the Desi version of the nannies are put-up at budget rental apartments to look after the kids while the parents party. ‘Maggi is banned so poor guys couldn’t pack-in month’s stock of noodles for the aayas. I am sure they found some ingenious economical ways though. A top-cop was matter-of-factly stating that all these London-wallas, their hair-follicles should be tested on their return from holidays.

126805951_chopard_408279cAs per the latest British Drug Survey UK officially gets fucked up more than any other European country, Are they all depressed escapists? Or do Londoners just love to party? They do so much Coke that traces of it’s in the water of Thames and FFS.The report says that UK use cocaine, heroin, ecstasy and amphetamine more than anywhere else on the continent.

So folks have a great time in London ‘coz’ the answer is BLOWIN’ in the wind!

Crash iPhone With ‘Text Of Doom’ Consisting Of Marathi & Other Characters

crash_iPhoneTech-savvy guys must be aware of this Most Annoying Prank! The effective power text,” also know as the text of doom,” has been crashing all iPhones that receive a specific string of Arabic, Marathi, and Chinese characters with the words “effective” and “power.” 

Apple have warned about the ‘effective. Power’ text, which causes your phone to shut down, and has advised on how to safeguard against it. This is a surefire way to annoy all your friends- a bug in the Apple operating system means that if you send this text to your friends, it will reset their phone.

iphone_image_for_a_3322669bThe string of characters are really specific, but if you copy and paste it into a text, it will turn their phone off.

 NEW: Apple releases fix for effective power iPhone crash prank

Only the people who know the characters will be able to send it to their friends, and once they do, the phone will crash.

It only works if you send it to someone who also has an iPhone.

Twitterati have found the prank funny and are using it to bug their friends.

Now A Petition To Revoke Caitlyn Jenner’s Olympic Medal

Catlyn Jenner41rOn6tNV0LThere’s a petition to revoke Caitlyn Jenner’s Olympic medal. Because in the world we live in there are people who don’t have much else to do but poke spokes in their spare time. Former Olympic gold medallist Bruce Jenner who is now Caitlyn Jenner won a Gold Medal for USA in Decathlon in the 1976 Olympics. Now that Bruce has dramatically  announced herself as Caitlyn Jenner to the world on Monday via a Vanity Fair cover, someone has set up a petition to have Jenner’s Olympic gold medal revoked on the basis that because she says she’s always identified as a woman, she was a woman when she entered Olympic competition. Jenner won gold for the men’s decathlon in 1976.

bruce_olympicsThe sugar-dipped petition reads : “We congratulate Ms. Jenner on these new developments and wish her the best. However, this creates somewhat of a problem as Ms. Jenner (as talented as she is) claims that she has always believed herself to be truly female, and therefore, was in violation of committee rules regarding women competing in men’s sports and vice versa. Therefore, it is with a heavy heart that we must ask whether or not it is proper that Ms. Jenner should retain her olympic records in light of this, as we must now either claim that Bruce Jenner and Caitlyn Jenner are two entirely different people (which we know is not true), or that Bruce Jenner was, in fact, a woman participating in a men’s event. It is only fair to all involved that women receive their credit as champions of the Decathalon and that the men racing Ms. Jenner are not expected to compete with a superior, streamlined being such as herself.”

kardashiansI don’t care a damn if Bruce Jenner was a woman trapped in a man’s body. I don’t care if now Jenner has blossomed into Caitlyn Jenner after battling 65 years of gender dysphoria. But this petition to revoke his Olympic Gold Medal is just bull-crap. Yes Caitlyn Jenner will make millions from the yet-to-be-aired Reality TV show that documents the transformation of Bruce Jenner to Caitlyn Jenner. Jenner knows Reality TV well from The Kardashians’ success. Good now Caitlyn can pay off the mortgage on the Malibu home and splurge some on other extravaganzas.

Best bit – Bruce Jenner would had never made it to the cover of Vanity Fair but Caitlyn Jenner did and that too shot by the legendary photographer, Annie Leibovitz!